(I)The amount of liquids you can take onboard a plane is limited to I think its 200ml? or is it 2L? for fear of SURPRISE SURPRISE - TERRORIST ATTACKS.
My mouth contains I believe, an excess of saliva which the total subsequently exceeds the limit by about 1000ml and yes you damn guessed right, my saliva is super flammable. *ka-boom*
Why so much? Because Im Reena. full stop.
I hope you realised I am joking about the saliva..... =_=
(II) The government, in its recent efforts to push school canteens to promote healthy living, has BANNNED VANILLA YOGHURT and only 99% FAT FREE/AKA 'DIET' yoghurts are to be sold.
Yup. Vanilla yoghurt is the perfect thing to take off the menu of course. But no, we shall not take hashbrowns off the list because hashbrowns are soaked in yummy artery-clogging oil/fat and they are super healthy.
Reduction of artiole diameter equates to heart pumping harder which equates to rising blood pressure which equates to blood pumped more and more red blood cells circulating around our young hot bods which SUBSEQUENTLY MEANS WE GET MORE OXYGEN AROUND OUR BRAIN TO AID BETTER STUDY. (geez I listen in Human Bio classes)
DAMN TRUE DAMN TRUE. *nods in agreement*
(III) Scientific studies have shown that consumption of more than 2 glasses of fruit juice per day produce fat/overweight/obese/KingKong look-a-like kids.
I dont know about this one.
Aiyah. might as well we DONT EAT.
DONT EAT ANYTHING OK?
WILL GET FAT.
Adopt my new mantra ok...beri impoktant:
Look no touch... or eat...
And LASTLY....
(IV) Cervical Cancer Vaccines for all females 12 to 26 years of age ADMINISTERED THROUGH THE SCHOOL!
Im 17 years 7 months and 13 days+ so that means Im going to get vaccinated for cervical cancer. *gasp*
I know theres the good side to this vaccine but its like saying 'BOOB JOBS VIA SCHOOL SYSTEM COS THERES A MUTATED BOOB GENE AND THUS FEMALES STARTING TO LOOK LIKE MEN!' and vice-versa the recent rise of man-boobs in guys aka MOOBS so yeah we got abit of gender confusion going on these days kinda thing....
so of course they intro boob jobs via schools. Must start early to er... get this problem off our chests....
_________________________________________
Dang I love the government. <3
*political love*
3 people commented:
HAHAHAHAHHA.
damn funny lar.
ahahahhahhaha!!!!~
im LAUGHING LIKE SIAO CAN
your school damn funny.
they should intro nose-jobs too.
for people with flat nose who cant breathe properly. HAHAHAHAA
its not the school, its the GAHMEN. the sch is just their way of geting the vaccine to us. but nonetheless i find it damn GHEY idea...
boob jobs? get ur mind out of the gutter child
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