Vermin War

I, for the love of anything, cannot understand why God invented the cockroach.

It is ugly, smelly, and absolutely useless. And I ESPECIALLY hate the way cockroaches move/fly/locomate.

I suddenly, as usual, got inspired to blog at 2am in the morning and as I was making my way out to the computer I spotted a huge cockroach scuttling across the kitchen floor. I held in every single scream my lungs and voicebox was instinctively going to produce and thus the bottled up scream energy was converted into heavy breathing and irregular heartbeat patterns.

My eyes frantically darted around for the 'roch spray. I couldnt allow the cockroach to go off and wait for it to reach the baits which my mum put around the house (the roach eats the bait and then it dies, and then its spirit will go into Cockroach Heaven). Take note my mum is a clean/neat freak. So don't assume I live in a filthy house. Its so clean I could eat off the floor.

Quit digressing.
I grabbed the big bottle of Baygon and tiptoed across to the infested vermin and with all my finger power, SPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAYYYYYEDD the little idiot.

For a few seconds it darted around trying to avoid the rain of deadly droplets falling upon it.

AHHH.
Then it did the worst thing a struggling cockroach/prey could do.

It ran into a corner.

*cue evil laughter and sultry grin from Reena*

So of course, it being in a corner, it can't run anywhere! I pressed down on the spray button even harder, the lack of pressure increasing ever so slightly (stupid weapon was running out) and rained the evil bugger, and thus at the same time expelling a whole load of my energy and causing me to lose about 100 calories in that short little battle.

That little bugger... so cute!

It went ARGH!
Then it went ORGHHHH!

Then it went YEOOWWW!

Then it flipped.

Then it flopped.

Then it turned upside down, exposing to me it to-die-for 6pack abs 8 PACK!!!. (NO HAIR LEH!)

I bet it was trying to seduce me with its abs
so that I would show mercy upon it.
But no, Reena doesn't forgive so easily. ^o^

And after it did a few sexy poses on its back
it died.
IT DIED!

25% of the kitchen floor is now covered with Eau de Baygon. I wonder what my Mommy will say in the morning..... =//

I swept up the dead bugger and chucked him outside the door. He went *plonk plonk plonk* on the concrete and hopefully this will show all other vermin in my house that one should never scare Reena, because, if it does, it will end up like Mr Roachie.

All in all, mission complete.

*dusts off hands*




NEXT!